Something I don’t know

Time cannot be mentioned to count back when I’m with you.I’m getting a little change to be soft after I met with you.They may say it’s because of love but I don’t want to introduce what’s love to me.I’m just staying and feeling so much fun with you in crazy.Yes,you don’t ask me for love and I’m not also ready for it.The only universal truth is like how much I feel happy and sweet while we are talking online.You bring me back to bear my smiles and take my soul into laughing so much time.We both have once felt down of heart-broken and I guess that doesn’t let me escape for joy in love again yet.Well,I don’t know what I’m going to do or say about feeling on you.All I can say is I’m so happy to chat with you .

 

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Matter To Timeline

At first, I thought I was nothing better than them. I saw all dark. I heard all blank. I was sitting under the silent stars. Then, I found out nothing. I got less to the zero.

Secondly, I picked a mirror and let myself see on that. My face was like odd in old. My eyebrows made byselves curved and crappily narrow. Why? I have been so uncomfortable seeing myself useless. I know quite well how much I am wonderful and powerful. Yes, in deep.

Then, I ordered the me to get up from that annoying idea and promote byself. I encouraged myself and treated better. What I got from me is the smily face through the super satisfication and self-esteem from the bottom of my heart.

Oh Golly! Finally, I found myself out successfully. Oh my Goash! I never knew that I looked that elegant the whole before. I cannot stop loving me now.

I am the only one who cannot be replaced in the world.

I am special.

I am smart.

I am beautiful.

I can do that.

Tomorrow is going to be a great day and everything seems so fine to me.

I am wonderful.

I Love You

I have never thought before that he came and loved me. Now it truly happens to me. OMG!!! It must be true to say that I could not get greedy for it from him. He is really a good guy. I never consider that I deserve him. He gets smarter of thinking than everyone that I have ever met of. To be honest, yes.. I used to want him to like me more a couple of years ago. He is gentle. He cares about me like he is my big brother. He respects me like his lady. He makes me feel loved and safe. His voice looks amazingly praceful and sweet. I cannot even believe that I have him now. Is that a dream??? Nope, it is just real…

We have same dreams together. Life is not simple. But I want a simple life with someone who believes of luck to have me. I had been in bussiness world for 2 years even I hated it a lots since my childhood life. I did many things which are not only I wanted to do but also hated to do. At there, I was not me. I was so much familiar with pretending and making people fools with their permission. Haha… someone taught me how to trace the lines I want. No matter what, there is always important to get ready to try for what we want. There is no cares about feelings, situations, attachments, sympathy and fairness. There is always only give and take. Oh.. Let me share something I have learnt from that moments they used to say –

” Love, Business and War…. Each is whenever Fair! ”

If you want something, go fight for it. I lived my life in it. I really followed the way of “Give and Take”. I was rough with my parents, especially with my Mom. I lost in touch with my childhood friends and some cousins. I stood alone. I stayed away from my relations. I was really silent. But I tried something throughout of this solo time. I followed with money, business connections and people who are smartly good at pretending. I chose that way of style in deep. What I did not notice is that he has been right there out always for me. I did absolutely forget him. Now his loving kindness makes me stronger and more peaceful than I ever was. It is not any conditional. We have same goals for philanthropy. I am peaceful and sweet by his Love.

Love may hurt us but it can also heal the best back.

MOTION

It is so wonderful that I thought I couldn’t get.

Bright is too high enough of considering the unique.

Never come back to thee things are finishing decide.

However something may left for something.

There is always something between us.

Sparkling wears the most beautiful dress in the world.

Just like doing in the universe, galaxy flashing

I was a little star there, twinkling many times

Around me is perfection, even the unicorn can’t help to stare at.

No only me, no only you, is there any pravivacy? Nope!

Each is in movement, small or big, no matter which

Preferable means nothing here for every

You and me, nothing

I got a toy that means to shine

Playing without teasing no much fun.

Oh..dear, I am without my body here!

Monica

F.A.M.I.L.Y

Sometimes I have no idea what I have been trying for. I used to get lost the words to speak out. I even rarely forget my name to be called. When I think it out, I remember nothing else. I get only a white blank memory. At those moments, I use my diary book to recall my memory back. So it goes…

My mom used to say …

” There are tomorrows which bring you a better world than you ever had. And you are going to get it by making it through. This is

called Life, sweetie. Go out and fight for it! “

What I learnt throughout of my past is that there is nothing I can take without any giving something else to the point what I want something from. Here they are going to say how ” Give and Take ” works certainly well with us. If I want something, surely I have to use my energy and time to get it in my hand.

I had stuff I want in the past. Oh.. there are countless which I would like to become in future and be with. Surprisingly, when the days passed by, things look disappear from my desire. I want nothing to be now. I want nobody. I want nothing else. I am waiting for my last day. Also, I am excited to see what I am going to happen after death.

Back To Life

Family. Yes! This little word comes to me so nicely. It is gentle but deeply strong. Sure thing! I want to live longer and more for it. Of course, I just forgot my family among the time I passed through. May be because it has been such long time I have not been with my family together. Oh..Golly! I do have it at least. I have something to be attached and it makes me to get back to life again. I am going to stay more and survive again. I am loved by family.

I am precisely about to try always remember my memories back even it is good or bad. I promise it!

P.D.P.L.E

I chose to take a little longer walk from my student’s flat. There are still some stuff I wanted to think of while on that walk. It has been such a long time I have not had those strange dreams at nights which I used to. They are like I was a powerful person who could fly and control my every single dream and the one who knew that I was in dream in each time. Yes, they all are just dreams that have ever belonged to me.

Do you think I am not surprised why I had those in my past? I was! Why? Because the rest of my friends and those around me were not familiar with that situation just like me. At first, I reminded myself that I had those dreams in the case I possesed a big fantasy as like I was a daydreamer and be yet. If I have nothing to do, I get used to spending my time in the imaginary world alone. So I hoped all those happenings were somehow related in my habbit.

Doubtfully most of the time, I could not stop thinking what the meaning of my existence is. What did I come for? What is my life meaning which is Happiness or Peacefulness or Love or Success or Richness or Sex or Loving Kindness? To be honest, I have still no idea byself even in my small world. I have once believed that I became a happy person when I found the Love for the first time of my life. I rare trust the people especially, the male. But I did trust that man, considering that I found Mr.Right for the rest of my life. However the truth is that I got to see which nothing is stable. I thank him for the lesson I got from our past. He is a good guy anyway. Well, it is just my past. I am not quite fond of sharing it much.

I met with many people who taught me how to handle life well. I met people who seeked the happiness from me and felt byself when with me. I met people who admitted that I changed their life by a word. I met people who really love and care about me. I met people whom I dislike and so do they. I met people who want to take advantages from me. I met people who wanted to grow old with me. I met …

Sometimes, I feel like I have a little power that let me know the stuff before it happens by those strange dreams or prompt and very small parts of image which suddenly appears in my eyes. You trust it or not, it is just the truth of mine and I do scare to still be it as mine. But I do extremely want my weird dreams back again. They are now far away from me. I miss them a lots. Last night, I had a dream that I could fly  wherever I want in the sky. And also, the love story in tragic was dreamt. It was based on the man who I really do not know and I. I was so in love with him and he was the same. But we both owned a bad fate for our love and struggled together against it. The last time I saw like I almost lost him by his death. I was out of control and felt like the whole world I was in had no faintest meaning at least to me. That feeling! Yes, I can never forget that kind of feeling in my life which I received from that dream last night. Love is powerful that can change things upside down or the super great.

I have that power to overview the people feelings, movements, situations a great deal. Thus, mostly I pre know the things they are going to play to each other or me. Humans are so poor enough to get involved in the games.

#People #Dreams #Power #Love #Eyes

WHAT IS HAPPINESS?

What is happiness?

It is not about success, wealth and sex. It is definately based on your inner mind. It is based on your time and compassionate love. It is incredible. It really exits.

People noted wrong that they are happy when they are hired at somewhere to work which they want or when they get something they want and need. But sooner or later, after they feel so down and tired at there, stress and pressure about what they wished come out. That happiness they have got since beginning is totally gone. Where is their happiness so? It is still with them to be figured out again.

You are completely worth it. You must be happy. You are valuable to go crazy in delightful. No door can ever close. Sometimes, we feel amused even for a little thing which happens to us. Sometimes, no great matter makes us happy. Why? We live and flow what we truly are. You can lie yourself but it only stands for a couple of times. Because it is universal real that we all love ourselves most likely in each of first single step. We are not loving anyone beyond our limits in most of time. It is all happening to us. You can assume that there are some super people who sacrifice themselves for their great love which raises their lovers up. There is no claim for it. However, this is very rare.

As we, human beings are crazy enough to do everything what we believe we want, there might be many sorts of different phenomena that probably depend on what we made. Thus, of course, happiness is also up to the want of different type of our attempts and even us. Sometimes, it appears by having the base of things loss. Conversely, we get happiness by possessing something we want. We cannot predict too big about it. Everything is changing in the each of single second. It is too hard for us to get rid of expectations but it will be no argument about happiness in hand when you can let yourselves keep less expectation on most things you enjoy to be with. We have to try to expand our compassionate love more and more than the passionate love.

We are the ones who appreciate the happiness.

MonicaIMG_20180606_075915